The older I get, the more attuned I am to the possibility that the young punks I work with will use my age against me. But to be fair, when I was in their clunky, black, square-toed oxford shoes, I was the same way.

 

I remember when I, too, thought that anyone over the age of 40 was obsolete. “Look at that dinosaur Carl,” I once said to my cohort Steve. “He can’t even figure out how to change the ball on his Selectric typewriter! I’ll bet he thinks Liquid Paper is for touching up spots on his belt and shoes!” 

 

I suspect that the gel-headed, tongue-spiked tattoo models in my office now say the same things about me. “Look at that dinosaur Dan,” Ameka probably says to Zack. “He asked me the other day if Linux was a car. I’ll bet he thinks megabits is a kind of cat food!”

 

One thing we veteran, experienced and mature workers should do—and I prefer all of those terms to pre-geezer or coot—is ensure that we keep our skills up to date. HR people call this re-skilling. Employees should constantly be re-skilling to learn how to use new software, painful as that may be, because you never want to be in the position of asking a younger person for help with your computer. If you do, chances are excellent that the young person will send an insulting text message about you to a list of recipients numbering in the thousands. That same young person will probably use that same cell phone to take a photo of you looking confused and post it on her blog before you can say “Thank you, Ameka.”

 

Speaking of blogs, some career counselors say that having one can “convey the image of a nimble-minded, forward-thinking techie.” Of course, it is not enough merely to have a blog. You must find ways to tell people you have a blog. Find opportunities to say things such as, “That reminds me of a post I did on my blog last night arguing for the MSM to re-skill.” For added hipness, say that when you’re sipping one of those energy drinks that has enough caffeine in it to rouse a corpse.

 

Staying current also means reading the latest business best-sellers and being able to pepper your conversation with references to them. Ask someone if they’ve read Crawfords’ “Shop Class as Soulcraft” and they will either think you’ve got some intellectual advantage over them or they will immediately run away—either of which is a win-win. You don’t even have to read these books all the way through. Just read the blurbs on the back cover and use the words centric, functionality and platform.

 

Appearance is another way to tell the world that you’re not as old as you really are. A 35-year-old who works to reintroduce re-skilled retirees into the workforce says you should not show up for an interview in a three-piece suit unless interviewing to be in the remake of “Father Knows Best.” She suggests buying a pair of khakis and a couple of shirts from The Gap. (Can anyone tell me what The Gap is?)

 

Be sensitive to how you talk. The older people get, the slower they speak. The average 50-year-old speaks at a rate of about 125 words per minute, while the average 25-year-old speaks at a rate of two dictionaries per second. Purposely try to talk as fast as you can, suggesting youthfulness, quick thinking and unquestioned command of your tongue.

 

Finally, be careful what you say. Terms such as “sound like a broken record” and “carbon copy” suggest that you are rooted in the past instead of being rerouted with your re-skilling.